Coming Out
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Coming out of the closet, often shortened to coming out, is a metaphor used to describe LGBT people's self-disclosure of their sexual orientation, romantic orientation or gender identity.
Framed and debated as a privacy issue, coming out of the closet is experienced variously as a psychological process or journey;[1] decision-making or risk-taking; a strategy or plan; a mass or public event; a speech act and a matter of personal identity; a rite of passage; liberation or emancipation from oppression; an ordeal;[2] a means toward feeling gay pride instead of shame and social stigma; or even a career-threatening act.[3] Author Steven Seidman writes that \"it is the power of the closet to shape the core of an individual's life that has made homosexuality into a significant personal, social, and political drama in twentieth-century America\".[4]
In early 20th-century Germany, \"coming out\" was called \"self-denunciation\" and entailed serious legal and reputational risks.[7] In his 1906 work, Das Sexualleben unserer Zeit in seinen Beziehungen zur modernen Kultur (The sexual life of our time in its relation to modern civilization),[8] Iwan Bloch, a German-Jewish physician, entreated elderly homosexuals to self-disclose to their family members and acquaintances. In 1914, Magnus Hirschfeld revisited the topic in his major work The Homosexuality of Men and Women, discussing the social and legal potentials of several thousand homosexual men and women of rank revealing their sexual orientation to the police in order to influence legislators and public opinion.[9] Hirschfeld did not support self-denunciation and dismissed the possibilities of a political movement based on open homosexuals.[7]
In the 1960s, Frank Kameny came to the forefront of the struggle. Having been fired from his job as an astronomer for the Army Map service in 1957 for homosexual behavior, Kameny refused to go quietly. He openly fought his dismissal, eventually appealing it all the way to the US Supreme Court. As a vocal leader of the growing movement, Kameny argued for unapologetic public actions. The cornerstone of his conviction was that, \"we must instill in the homosexual community a sense of worth to the individual homosexual\", which could only be achieved through campaigns openly led by homosexuals themselves.With the spread of consciousness raising (CR) in the late 1960s, coming out became a key strategy of the gay liberation movement to raise political consciousness to counter heterosexism and homophobia. At the same time and continuing into the 1980s, gay and lesbian social support discussion groups, some of which were called \"coming-out groups\", focused on sharing coming-out \"stories\" (experiences) with the goal of reducing isolation and increasing LGBT visibility and pride.
Gay people in the pre-war years [pre-WWI] ... did not speak of coming out of what we call \"the gay closet\" but rather of coming out into what they called \"homosexual society\" or the \"gay world\", a world neither so small, nor so isolated, nor, often, so hidden as \"closet\" implies.[13]
An article on coming out[15] in the online encyclopedia glbtq.com states that sexologist Evelyn Hooker's observations introduced the use of \"coming out\" to the academic community in the 1950s. The article continues by echoing Chauncey's observation that a subsequent shift in connotation occurred later on. The pre-1950s focus was on entrance into \"a new world of hope and communal solidarity\" whereas the post-Stonewall Riots overtone was an exit from the oppression of the closet.[15] This change in focus suggests that \"coming out of the closet\" is a mixed metaphor that joins \"coming out\" with the closet metaphor: an evolution of \"skeleton in the closet\" specifically referring to living a life of denial and secrecy by concealing one's sexual orientation. The closet metaphor, in turn, is extended to the forces and pressures of heterosexist society and its institutions.
When coming out is described as a gradual process or a journey,[1] it is meant to include becoming aware of and acknowledging one's gender identity, gender expression, or non-hetero-normative sexual orientation or attraction. This preliminary stage, which involves soul-searching or a personal epiphany,[16] is often called \"coming out to oneself\" and constitutes the start of self-acceptance. Many LGBT people say that this stage began for them during adolescence or childhood, when they first became aware of their sexual orientation toward members of the same sex. Coming out has also been described as a process because of a recurring need or desire to come out in new situations in which LGBT people are assumed to be heterosexual or cisgender, such as at a new job or with new acquaintances. A major frame of reference for those coming out has included using an inside/outside perspective, where some assume that the person can keep their identity or orientation a secret and separate from their outside appearance. This is not as simple as often thought, as Diana Fuss (1991) argues, \"the problem of course with the inside/outside rhetoric ... is that such polemics disguise the fact that most of us are both inside and outside at the same time\".
Every coming out story is the person trying to come to terms with who they are and their sexual orientation.[17] Several models have been created to describe coming out as a process for gay and lesbian identity development, e.g. Dank, 1971; Cass, 1984; Coleman, 1989; Troiden, 1989. Of these models, the most widely accepted is the Cass identity model established by Vivienne Cass.[18] This model outlines six discrete stages transited by individuals who successfully come out: identity confusion, identity comparison, identity tolerance, identity acceptance, identity pride, and identity synthesis. However, not every LGBT person follows such a model. For example, some LGBT youth become aware of and accept their same-sex desires or gender identity at puberty in a way similar to which heterosexual teens become aware of their sexuality, i.e. free of any notion of difference, stigma or shame in terms of the gender of the people to whom they are attracted.[19] Regardless of whether LGBT youth develop their identity based on a model, the typical age at which youth in the United States come out has been dropping. High school students and even middle school students are coming out.[20][21][22]
Transgender people vary greatly in choosing when, whether, and how to disclose their transgender status to family, close friends, and others. The prevalence of discrimination[24] and violence against transgender people (in the United States, for example, transgender people are 28% more likely to be victims of violence)[25] can make coming out a risky decision. Fear of retaliatory behavior, such as being removed from the parental home while underage, is a cause for transgender people to not come out to their families until they have reached adulthood.[26] Parental confusion and lack of acceptance of a transgender child may result in parents treating a newly revealed gender identity as a \"phase\" or making efforts to change their children back to \"normal\" by utilizing mental health services to alter the child's gender identity.[27][28]
The internet can play a significant role in the coming out process for transgender people. Some come out in an online identity first, providing an opportunity to go through experiences virtually and safely before risking social sanctions in the real world.[29][30] However, while many trans people find support online that they may not have in real life, others encounter bullying and harassment when coming out online. According to a study published by Blumenfeld and Cooper in 2012,[31] youth who identify as LGBT are 22% less likely to report online bullying due to factors such as parents not believing or understanding them, or fear of having to come out to explain the incident. This further shows the barriers that trans individuals can have when coming out.
In areas of the world where homosexual acts are penalized or prohibited, gay men, lesbians, and bisexual people can suffer negative legal consequences for coming out. In particular, where homosexuality is a crime, coming out may constitute self-incrimination. These laws still exist in 75 countries worldwide, including Egypt, Iran, and Afghanistan.
Because LGBT people have historically been marginalized as sexual minorities, coming out of the closet remains a challenge for most of the world's LGBT population and can lead to a backlash of heterosexist discrimination and homophobic violence.
Depending on the relational bond between parents and children, a child coming out as lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender can be positive or negative. Strong, loving relationships between children and their parents may be strengthened but if a relationship is already strained, those relationships may be further damaged or destroyed by the child coming out.[39] If people coming out are accepted by their parents, this allows open discussions of dating and relationships and allows parents to help their children with coping with discrimination and to make healthier decisions regarding HIV/AIDS.[40] Because parents, families, and close others can reject someone coming out to them, the effects of coming out on LGBT individuals are not always positive.[41] For example, teens who had parents who rejected them when they came out showed more drug use, depression, suicide attempts and risky sexual behaviors later on as young adults.[42] Some studies find that the health effects of coming out depends more on the reactions of parents than on the disclosure itself.[43]
A number of studies have been done on the effect of people coming out to their parents. A 1989 report by Robinson et al. of parents of out gay and lesbian children in the United States found that 21% of fathers and 28% of mothers had suspected that their child was gay or lesbian, largely based on gender atypical behaviour during childhood. The 1989 study found that two-thirds of parents reacted negatively.[44] A 1995 study (that used young people's reactions) found that half of the mothers of gay or bisexual male college students \"responded with disbelief, denial or negative comments\" while fathers reacted slightly better. 18% of parents reacted \"with acts of intolerance, attempts to convert the child to heterosexuality, and verbal threats to cut off financial or emotional support\".[45] 59ce067264
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